"What Do I Do Now?" Some Helpful Suggestions

When You Return Home

  • Contact other family members and close friends.  Gather a circle of people who will provide emotional support.
  • Notify your spiritual leader such as a pastor, priest, or rabbi.  Let them know if you want the funeral or memorial service at your place of worship.
  • Call the funeral home you have chosen.  Let them know of any special services you may need.  If you have not already done so, notify the hospital about which funeral home will be serving you. Call Decedent Affairs anytime at (434) 924-5018.
  • Have a relative, friend, or neighbor answer the phone or help with phone calls, if there are many people to notify.
  • Have someone keep a list of all phone calls received, flowers and food donations.

Prior to Going to the Funeral Home

  • Funeral and burial options vary.  Ask for descriptions and costs of the kind of service that will honor your loved one. One non-profit consumer resource is http://www.funerals.org/.
  • Bring any insurance information. Gather information for the obituary -- full name and nicknames, date of birth, occupation, father's and mother's names, list of relatives and relationships, and any military service.  Include a list of church, professional organizations, clubs or other memberships held.
  • Bring the names of organizations or charities you wish to have donations made in memory of your loved one.
  • Select and bring the clothing in which your loved one will be buried.
  • Make arrangements for food or a reception after the burial service.  Perhaps a friend can oversee this task.
  • Obtain a book for signatures for those present at the funeral or memorial service.  Provide a basket to collect cards people bring.
  • Be thinking of individuals who might be available as pallbearers and/or persons who may speak about your loved one at the service.